dreaming of brothers and husbands

My brother Jamie died in 1991, three years after a head injury in 1988. I still dream about him sometimes, but oftentimes get him confused with my husband Jerry, who's just two weeks younger than Jamie.

When I do dream of Jamie himself, I can tell that my mind is confused: in the dream I struggle between accepting that he's alive and wondering how it's possible.

But most times I'll think of Jamie as Jerry, or vice versa. I might have Jerry drumming (Jamie was a drummer, like me), but I'm thinking of him as Jamie.